Browsing My Thoughts

RIP Sean Connery…


I grew up watching him in Bond movies with my dad. He was always my favorite Bond, classic style for a different time. I also loved him in First Knight, The Rock, Hunt For Red October, Indiana Jones, Highlander, Bridge too far, and so many others. He is probably the only actor I can do a half-decent impression of.

There can only be one.

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News Fasting.


Lindsey and I have been on a news fast since early September. It has been really good. I think I am going to stick with it and only do news every 2 to 4 weeks on a Sunday. We are just tired of it and powerless to do anything about the direction of the USA. We bribe politicians, we vote, we call, etc.

I wish I could click my heels and it was Nov 10th and the election was over just to get through this period.

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39 Years Old :)



We got to Slovenia yesterday and we are just taking it easy today after a few days of driving. Slovenia is the 47th country I’ve visited and pretty cool to add that to the list :). I wonder when and if my age will bypass the number of countries I’ve visited. Lindsey had candles and some wonderful cake and balloons. Good birthday week :)

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Trump’s Plague


How long until the USA is hitting 100k a day in new infections?

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Good watch.


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The USA right now.


I do not want violence, but how can you not understand the desire to burn this system to the ground that has failed a group of people so badly?

Put yourself in a black person’s shoes. Count the number of people who look like you who have been shot and police let off without any repercussions. Then count the daily interactions you have with a society that treats your children, your siblings, and your family as 2nd class citizens.

The vast majority of people protesting are doing it peacefully. That is remarkable. You should listen to them.

The violence happening is a very small minority, but how can you condemn it? People are angry, they are tired, they have been trying to get change and nothing is happening.

It reminds me of the Boston Tea riot. When Americans said enough and responded by hurting commercial businesses who were part of the system oppressing them. They violently destroyed millions of dollars worth of tea, ran another ship aground trying to do the same, broke into shops, and other violent actions. Why? Because they

Whether or not Samuel Adams helped plan the Boston Tea Party is disputed, but he immediately worked to publicize and defend it. He argued that the Tea Party was not the act of a lawless mob, but was instead a principled protest and the only remaining option the people had to defend their constitutional rights.

I think the USA is a *failed* State.

The country is broken, it needs a new social contract with its citizens.

Especially Black Americans, especially poor Americans, especially any minority in America, especially the middle class. We deserve a better economic contract and a better social contract.

How could you not be violent with this bullshit?

Fuck this system.

Imagine being Black and watching time after time police getting off for killing a black person on film. Raising your kids in that environment and trying to explain to them why they have to live in a totally different way. Having them watch as society and police treat you like a criminal. Now do that every generation since your family were slaves.

It is fucking bullshit.

I want to burn this shit down, we need to start over. So much of America is fundamentally broken.

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Recomend: Like Stories Of Old


This is one of my favorite shows on YouTube and I highly recommend taking a look! Like Stories Of Old explores stories, arch types, and life in general. If you like the below please sponsor their work.

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Why do we raise kids with amazing stories and then stick them in cubicles?


We recently got Disney+ so I’ve been watching Rescue Rangers and Scrooge McDuck with Calico. It made me think about the stories I grew up with and how they were always full of adventure, treasure, investigations, secret passageways, and danger. Yet, once kids get to adult age they find out life is much different than these shows.

Why do we do that to them? Is that harmful?

Should we replace these cartoons with cartoons of people adulting and trying to sign up for healthcare and figure out which plan is the best one while realizing insurance companies win no matter what? Or, maybe a cartoon of people working out of a dark cubicle staring at a screen for 8+ hours? My guess is ratings would take a dive…

Or, is this just me, and everyone else watched those shows but didn’t really think they were what life could be like.

I feel slightly weird watching these with Calico and seeing these amazing adventures only to know that barely anyone gets to have a life like this. Beyond the fact, they are obviously impossible fiction stories it seems like we are glamorizing the impossible. Kinda like the Kardashians (which there is good evidence is psychologically damaging).

Is what we are doing any different than what we did around campfires x years ago?

It is hard for me to watch these knowing that a future life for Calico is the USA has no paid vacation, no sick days, and no health care.

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Mind blowing post!!! Do you have an internal monologue?


I ran into this post a few weeks ago and it was mind-blowing!!!


People have a voice in their head and it speaks in full sentences??!?!?!?

I can’t hear a voice in my head, I more get images and words that flash in my head and jump all over the place. More like a mind map thing that pops up. If I want to say something in my head I have to say it out loud.

I asked my wife and she has a voice, I asked a few friends and they had voices too. That is crazy to me. What a deeply personal thing that we don’t really talk about. I did not know there was an option for something beyond the flashes of words and images and concepts and ideas.

I always thought in movies/tv where they have that voice in the head portrayal that it was just something they used in movies to show what people were thinking.

Do you hear a voice in your head with your inner monologue? Or, do you get the word/concept/mind-map bit?

This makes me wonder about my speed-reading ability as the video in this post is an interview with someone like me and she reads fast too. And, my ability to speak “crazy” which my life likes where I can jump between random things so fast. I don’t think I ever hear the dialogue in my dreams. So many questions :)

I don’t even know!

Watch this video, I resonated with so much of what she described:

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Cracks me up :)


Saw this flash by on Twitter today…

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On starting a new company…


Starting a new company is ALWAYS hard but starting a B2B SAAS company is even harder. A lot of my previous companies were self serve or they were affiliate/advertising driven or they were service companies in a proven field. Creating a brand new software product and selling B2B is HARD.

I’ve had to teach myself sales and it was a steep learning curve. I never want to do enterprise sales again but I am pretty happy with mid-market at this point. It is a really good skill to have and I have a much deeper appreciation for salespeople and what they do. It is not easy and it is def a skill.

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Beach day!


We went to the beach Sunday! The weather was amazing, sunny and in the low 70s. Calico has been talking about going for a while and he had a blast. He got a little too excited when we first got there, he tried to run into the water not realizing water doesn’t move like air. He fell in and I sprinted over to see a look a shock on his face as he came running out and totally soaked. It was very cold. He was hilarious though, he just stripped down to his diaper, warmed up with mommy, and then started playing in the sand.

The beach had tons of ladybugs!!! Flying all over and landing on our hair. If you are going to give me a swarm of something, please let it be cute ladybugs.

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2020 Plans: Let “it” go.


My theme of the year is “let it go” (watch the video here).

What is “it”?
The frantic energy that is anxiety and insecurity and hard to define. It is the inability to hold still or be at peace. I want to work on getting back to my quiet place. A place where I can just sit and feel calm and more deliberate and more present.

My big 3 for the year?

1. Let “it” go & find my calm. This influences so many things with me, relationships, and work.

2. Make something awesome w/ Shepherd. Starting a new business is HARD and sometimes I forget to have fun. I am working on that and trying to remember that “fun” is a factor in what we are choosing to do/build.

3. Enjoy our time in Europe and figure out some individual and family adventures.

Onward to a very futuristic sounding 2020!

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2019 in Review.


2019 was a good year :).

I spent the year trying to make the new business work and learned a TON. I made a lot of sales/timing mistakes… and I hopefully learned from them. I always forget how hard it is to boot up a new business (especially without a service aspect to use as a crutch). Let’s go exploring was a good theme for the year…

The Amazing
Lindsey and I have been married for 5 years! Adding a kid to the mix has definitely made marriage harder but I think we are on the road to finding our sea legs. Calico turned 3 a few days ago and watching him turn into even more of a little person has been a blast :). I love our little family!

The new business is in the midst of a pivot and I am finding our first 10 clients now to see if we are on the right track. Learning sales has been hard + rewarding. The meeting idea just wasn’t clicking and we are pivoting to helping engineers find their perfect engineering team. I am way more excited about helping people find a great place to work.

We moved to Valencia Spain for a few years :). We felt like the timing was right and living abroad was something we both wanted to try.

My back has been almost entirely pain-free this year (as long as I keep up with rehab 2x-3x a week). And, biking has been great for it as well and given me a physical outlet. I did not get to do a bike tour this year… partially because of work and partially just timing, but I am hopeful I can do one or two in 2020.

What fun stuff did we do this year?
– We did an awesome trip to Malta and Valencia Spain over 3 months in February, March, and April. We did an agri and food tour in Malta that was delicious and interesting. I visited an underground temple called the Hypogeum in Malta that dates back to 3300BC (insanely special place). And, we fell in love with Valencia Spain in so many ways. I bought an apartment in Valencia and we moved here at the end of the year (pictures coming soon). We are slowly getting settled here.
– We went on a 2-week road trip all over Spain and Portugal. It was so much fun! I got to see a ton of Roman ruins, eat some delicious pulpo, and enjoy Roman hot springs. It was one of my favorite family trips yet. I hope we get to do another road trip soon.
– Calico and I went to the pool over the summer and it was so much fun. He even went down the monster water slide :).
– A ton of great times with Lucas and Claire in Colorado. Either hiking, or biking, or just hanging out and talking. I miss them!
– A great summer in Colorado and a lot of trips to the Farmer’s market on Saturday mornings. We are usually out of town in the summer so it was nice to be home and enjoy it.
– We went to Munich for a week to explore the Christmas markets. Fun trip! I did a 3-hour walking tour of the 3rd Reich in Munich that was intense. Weird to see where Hitler did some water coloring and then where he unveiled the Nazi flag. Felt shivers down my spine several times hearing too many historic events that mirrored the news the last few years.
– I read a lot of good books this year!

The Challenges!

2019 was a good year and I figured a ton out about how I want to spend the bulk of my day. The new business hasn’t clicked yet, but we are in the midst of a pivot and I am really excited about what we are trying to build with Shepherd. I am learning a shit ton about sales and we shall see how that goes over the next 90 days.

It has been a year of learning when it comes to marriage :). Trying to boot up a new business while raising a 2-year-old while so many other things don’t make marriage any easier. We’ve had some good conversations lately and I am hopeful that 2020 is going to be the best year of our marriage for me/us. I think it took me five years to really fathom how different people are (sure you know it, but to really understand what that means is different). It is a good lesson to learn.

I got sick a lot in 2019, ~5 times! That is really abnormal versus previous years where I hadn’t been sick in maybe 2 or 3 years. I think it is due to stress and energy management and it is something I am going to be paying close attention to for 2020. I tend to push myself pretty hard when maybe I should let off the gas by about 15%. Otherwise, my health has been good and my back great. I am stronger than I have ever been, and my cardio is slowly getting up there as I bike more. I did better in 2019 with prepping food for my diet and Lindsey helped by cooking big meals for me a few times each week.

How did I do on my goals for 2019?
The theme of the year was to go exploring. I feel really good about the path the new business is on and I am excited to see if I can sale “it” and find a product fit that resonates. Going back to work full time this year helped me to see more of where I want to go and why. Slightly cryptic but it is nice to gain some self gnosis around what drives you and how that has changed. I could have been a lot more patient with myself this year… and kinder. Still working on that.

I did well on my goals for the year, although I missed two big ones. The first was that I really wanted to do a bike tour and didn’t. The second was that I had hoped to make a little more progress on our family vision, but I will attribute that to it just being a slow process and my lack of patience.


New decade!!!!! Exciting :)

I’ll make a longer post in 2020… some pics from my wip theme for 2020…

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I don’t drink much anymore, but I am really liking Port if I do have a treat. I really like this 20-year-old Tawney Taylor Fladgate Port I got last year. I got some other bottles for Christmas that I am slowly trying too.

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This is bwb’s personal blog so he can share his thoughts with the world, however scary or silly they might be. Plus family and friends can track what I am up too, and where I am in the world.

I am pretty simple. I love Mangos. I love the ocean, although mostly at sunset as I’m a ginger. I love to travel, eat exotic food, read, and use my imagination. I love creating and developing ideas into businesses, understanding how all businesses work, and building cool stuff. I am a globalist and see the entire world as my responsibility and playground. And, I am married to an amazing woman who makes life even more fun :)! And, we are now the proud parents of Calico Jack :).

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