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Energy, energy, energy.

December24

I am notorious for working and living my life in a series of burnout cycles. And, I love it. I like to work very hard and then balance that with significant downtime. The challenge is timing when to slow down and making sure I get quality downtime when I do. I didn’t do a good job with burnout this year. And, I am paying for it now with a cold, general exhaustion, and a physical injury I got a few weeks ago.

It is really hard when a business is new and small to be able to take quality downtime. When I did manage some downtime I went on an adventure instead of vacation and that didn’t replenish me (I also needed an adventure). And, it also didn’t help that we didn’t go on a family vacation in 2021 due to covid related reasons. I take solace in the fact that I am about 100x better at managing myself than I was 10 years ago as I used to just run through walls. It was fun but I don’t want to do that now to myself or my family (especially if I want to stay healthy).

Starting a new business is hard, it is like juggling 3 knives and a hungry tiger. You are lucky if you only get cut.

Starting a new business while you are married and have a young kid is even harder, it is like juggling 3 tigers, 6 chainsaws, and 9 knives. Especially when you want to stay happily married and be part of your son’s life :). It is always a learning process and I’ve done fairly well this year while working a ton to boot Shepherd up. I am going to aim to do better next year, as I didn’t leave enough space in between all those things this year. Some of that was on purpose, some of that was trying to accelerate Shepherd.

Just some random thoughts I’ve been mulling on the last few months…

posted under Business, Dangers To World, Life Planning & Execution | Comments Off on Energy, energy, energy.

2020 Plans: Let “it” go.

January13

My theme of the year is “let it go” (watch the video here).

What is “it”?
The frantic energy that is anxiety and insecurity and hard to define. It is the inability to hold still or be at peace. I want to work on getting back to my quiet place. A place where I can just sit and feel calm and more deliberate and more present.

My big 3 for the year?

1. Let “it” go & find my calm. This influences so many things with me, relationships, and work.

2. Make something awesome w/ Shepherd. Starting a new business is HARD and sometimes I forget to have fun. I am working on that and trying to remember that “fun” is a factor in what we are choosing to do/build.

3. Enjoy our time in Europe and figure out some individual and family adventures.

Onward to a very futuristic sounding 2020!

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2019 in Review.

December31

2019 was a good year :).

I spent the year trying to make the new business work and learned a TON. I made a lot of sales/timing mistakes… and I hopefully learned from them. I always forget how hard it is to boot up a new business (especially without a service aspect to use as a crutch). Let’s go exploring was a good theme for the year…

The Amazing
Lindsey and I have been married for 5 years! Adding a kid to the mix has definitely made marriage harder but I think we are on the road to finding our sea legs. Calico turned 3 a few days ago and watching him turn into even more of a little person has been a blast :). I love our little family!

The new business is in the midst of a pivot and I am finding our first 10 clients now to see if we are on the right track. Learning sales has been hard + rewarding. The meeting idea just wasn’t clicking and we are pivoting to helping engineers find their perfect engineering team. I am way more excited about helping people find a great place to work.

We moved to Valencia Spain for a few years :). We felt like the timing was right and living abroad was something we both wanted to try.

My back has been almost entirely pain-free this year (as long as I keep up with rehab 2x-3x a week). And, biking has been great for it as well and given me a physical outlet. I did not get to do a bike tour this year… partially because of work and partially just timing, but I am hopeful I can do one or two in 2020.

What fun stuff did we do this year?
– We did an awesome trip to Malta and Valencia Spain over 3 months in February, March, and April. We did an agri and food tour in Malta that was delicious and interesting. I visited an underground temple called the Hypogeum in Malta that dates back to 3300BC (insanely special place). And, we fell in love with Valencia Spain in so many ways. I bought an apartment in Valencia and we moved here at the end of the year (pictures coming soon). We are slowly getting settled here.
– We went on a 2-week road trip all over Spain and Portugal. It was so much fun! I got to see a ton of Roman ruins, eat some delicious pulpo, and enjoy Roman hot springs. It was one of my favorite family trips yet. I hope we get to do another road trip soon.
– Calico and I went to the pool over the summer and it was so much fun. He even went down the monster water slide :).
– A ton of great times with Lucas and Claire in Colorado. Either hiking, or biking, or just hanging out and talking. I miss them!
– A great summer in Colorado and a lot of trips to the Farmer’s market on Saturday mornings. We are usually out of town in the summer so it was nice to be home and enjoy it.
– We went to Munich for a week to explore the Christmas markets. Fun trip! I did a 3-hour walking tour of the 3rd Reich in Munich that was intense. Weird to see where Hitler did some water coloring and then where he unveiled the Nazi flag. Felt shivers down my spine several times hearing too many historic events that mirrored the news the last few years.
– I read a lot of good books this year!

The Challenges!

Komorebi!
2019 was a good year and I figured a ton out about how I want to spend the bulk of my day. The new business hasn’t clicked yet, but we are in the midst of a pivot and I am really excited about what we are trying to build with Shepherd. I am learning a shit ton about sales and we shall see how that goes over the next 90 days.

Marriage
It has been a year of learning when it comes to marriage :). Trying to boot up a new business while raising a 2-year-old while so many other things don’t make marriage any easier. We’ve had some good conversations lately and I am hopeful that 2020 is going to be the best year of our marriage for me/us. I think it took me five years to really fathom how different people are (sure you know it, but to really understand what that means is different). It is a good lesson to learn.

Health
I got sick a lot in 2019, ~5 times! That is really abnormal versus previous years where I hadn’t been sick in maybe 2 or 3 years. I think it is due to stress and energy management and it is something I am going to be paying close attention to for 2020. I tend to push myself pretty hard when maybe I should let off the gas by about 15%. Otherwise, my health has been good and my back great. I am stronger than I have ever been, and my cardio is slowly getting up there as I bike more. I did better in 2019 with prepping food for my diet and Lindsey helped by cooking big meals for me a few times each week.

How did I do on my goals for 2019?
The theme of the year was to go exploring. I feel really good about the path the new business is on and I am excited to see if I can sale “it” and find a product fit that resonates. Going back to work full time this year helped me to see more of where I want to go and why. Slightly cryptic but it is nice to gain some self gnosis around what drives you and how that has changed. I could have been a lot more patient with myself this year… and kinder. Still working on that.

I did well on my goals for the year, although I missed two big ones. The first was that I really wanted to do a bike tour and didn’t. The second was that I had hoped to make a little more progress on our family vision, but I will attribute that to it just being a slow process and my lack of patience.

2020…

New decade!!!!! Exciting :)

I’ll make a longer post in 2020… some pics from my wip theme for 2020…

posted under Life Planning & Execution, My Thoughts | Comments Off on 2019 in Review.

Home is where…

February16

I was a nomad for a really long time and it did not bother me to not have much of a “home”. When I was renting rooms or apartments I slept on a mattress on the floor, kept things pretty minimal, and never felt a desire for much more. As I got older I got some cheap legs for my bed so people wouldn’t make fun of me… but I never felt a big desire to create a “home”.

In 2014 something changed and I didn’t feel weird about buying pots and pans and more than one spoon. It was a good change. It was after a few years of traveling and moving around a lot and I guess I was at a point in my life that I was ready for a “home”.

Fast forward to today, I’ve got a family (which is 90% of my home), but we also bought a house in Boulder, and along with Mrs. Fox, we have turned it into a real home that I love. I have a really comfy Wave mattress on my bed, I’ve got a veggie steamer that works great, pots and pans that make it easy for me to stay on my diet, I’ve got a big comfy bean bag to read in, I’ve got a comfy couch to watch movies in, I’ve got an indoor bike setup I love, a mountain bike so I can jump on trails, and so on. And, when we come back from long trips I am filled with pleasure to be “home” which is a feeling I’ve never really had before.

We are on a 3 month trip to Malta & Spain and after a few nights at an AirBNB with a really shitty bed/mattress, I started thinking about the tension I have between enjoying comfort but fearing the weakness it causes. I’ve got a strong belief that hardship creates meaning in life. So, what have I been thinking about?

As I get older it seems like I enjoy having a comfortable mattress more, is that a weakness? And, if so how much should I fight it? I used to sleep on hotel floors under tables at ultimate tournaments, and now I sleep in a bed every night. What impact does this have on my well being?

I miss my vegetable steamer, that seems like a stupid annoyance, am I making my home too easy and what impact does it have on my psychology and passion for life if things continue to get easier and easier at “home” as I get older?

These might sound silly but they really bug me. I worry a lot about how easy everyone wants to make life and how that seems to drain the pleasure & meaning from it. Don’t like vacuuming? Have a robot that does it for you 24/7. Don’t want to wash your own dishes? No worries, get a machine to do it and buy way more dishes then you need. Don’t like missing TV when you are pooping? Put TVs in every room of your house. Don’t like cooking? Have a service send you ingredients for 5x the price. Don’t like cleaning? Hire someone to do all of it. Weird kitchen machine that does x just 10 seconds faster but only has a single purpose? Buy it even though you make that thing only 2x a year.

I don’t think making something easier is bad, but I think it needs to be done selectively. If you don’t like cleaning toilets outsourcing it is great, but I think it could be bad for my life if I start outsourcing all hardship. It just seems like the entire USA tries to outsource anything that requires a little hardship as an ideal.

Anyway…

I’ve decided a comfy bed is important, sleep is crucial :). That said I also think it is great to go sleep on the ground, or in the back of a truck, or a bad Airbnb bed for a time. It is nice to remind yourself the other way isn’t so hard, and you value the enormity of what you do have.

On the rest of the stuff, I am going to cut myself some slack as I can be hard on myself. I just don’t want to end up one of those people who doesn’t travel because they fear a less comfortable environment. The idea scares me. I’d like to be 75 years old and sleeping in a seat on a rickety old train in Russia and enjoying life. Or the same goes for going camping with just the basics and not bringing all the comfort of home with you.

And, I am going to try to stay aware of my home and being careful to draw a line between comfort and superfluous comfort. As well as big questions like do we need a TV, can I go a month without hot water, or y, or z. Such a weird 1st world problem, but one that seems intrinsically linked to basic human happiness and fulfillment.

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2018 Plans…

January1

2018 is going to be a pretty cool year :).

I am very lucky in that I have some free time and the resources to play with a variety of ideas on what I want to do next. For the last couple years, I have been thinking about how to help entrepreneurs “entrepreneur” better and also looking at ways to encourage people to start a business. It is a huge and ambiguous area, but one I am really passionate about and I want to see what I can do.

I really love what Vistage and EO offer entrepreneurs in terms of a face to face meetings, and I want to see what I can create online to provide some of those same benefits to the entrepreneur and their business. Plus I want to create some content sites that provide quality instead of the “top 10 ways entrepreneurs put on their pants” bullshit posts. I love INC magazine and the rest of that industry, but a lot of their online articles are utter shit.

Big 3 for the year?

1. Figure out what is next for me. To do that I need to ensure I have enough wide open time to try a bunch of things and see what feels right.

2. I want to help entrepreneurs “entrepreneur”, but I am just not sure how I want to go about that. I’ve got a bunch of ideas and I am going to spend my time exploring & testing those options. By the end of the year, I want to see what is resonating with me and others.

3. I want to spend a ton of time pursuing a new sport… specifically, mountain biking plus bike touring. I need a new sport since I gave up long-distance trail running in 2014 in order to keep my back healthy.

Onward to 2018!

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2017 In Review.

December28

2017 was a good year, with a TON of life changes :). This year felt like I was finally exhaling after holding my breath for a very long time. Things also started to slow down compared to previous years.

Work-wise the end of 2016 brought the end of World Wide Web Hosting LLC and Bweeb INC which was a big weight off my mind in 2017. I exited Pressed in June 2017, and although it did not end the way I wanted, I am happy the team landed with a great company (Envato). I spent the rest of the year resting, spending time with my family, and a few small side projects. It has been a much-needed break after the craziness of the last few years (2004 through 2016).

The biggest change this year was the arrival of Calico Jack on December 30th, 2016. We are having such a blast with him! His mom loves to dress him up, and this is a spectacular family gif that represents why I love them so much :). It is fun to see his personality develop, and I love getting down on the floor to crawl and play!

The Amazing
Lindsey and I have been married for three years and it has been great :)! Marriage is crazy hard sometimes, and also super rewarding. It really does get better and better every year… and Lindsey is an awesome partner in crime!

Boulder is starting to feel more and more like home. We were both so nomadic for so long it is a good feeling to have. I am loving the sunshine, instant access to nature, and our house.

I sold my stake in Pressed to Envato in June, and I took the rest of the year off to relax and spend time with my family. This is the cumulation of all the chaos and hard work since 2014 and I am happy to have a break. I am also ready to be do something besides web hosting I think… I’ve been in that industry since 2001 (16+ years!).

What fun stuff did I do this year?
– Lindsey, Calico, and I went on an amazing month-long trip to Strasbourg France. We wanted to travel with him when he was a little and the timing was perfect. He was 5 months when we left, and 6 months when we got back. Just barely crawling, sleeping a lot, and a good travel baby. His nighttime schedule was chaos, but oh well. Rose & Steve visited which was a blast too. We had fun :).
– I had a two week solo vacation to St. Maartin to help decompress after selling the business. It is incredibly challenging to sell a business and then start disconnecting all the routine and energy you built to support that endeavor. I took this break in July/August and in hindsight, it would have been smarter to take it later in the year. It took at least 3 to 4 months to feel like my energy levels were reset.
– I took a 3-week trip with my dad to China. We visited my brother, who lives in Shanghai, and look around. The highlight was the Yellow Mountains and getting to spend time with my brother and dad (I wish I had more time with my brother as I had fun watching movies and hanging out). There are a ton of pictures from this trip here and a summary here.
– I started working out with a trainer on my annular disc tear and it feels so much better. I found that I enjoy the strength training and started doing that 3x a week. I feel a lot stronger and it has been super fun.
– I did a ton of hiking with Graham and Daniel this year, fun times! Daniel moved to Portland in June, but hopefully, I can make my way that way to visit and do some hiking there :).
– I bought a super fun truck!
– I launched a site for Entrepreneur Parents to crowdsource advice in that department. Check it out at EntrepreneurParents.org. It is just a fun project but it aligns with what I want to do next… which is to help entrepreneurs do amazing stuff. I’ve got another three sites coming down the pipeline in early 2018.
April 23rd 2017 happened, it was magnificent.

The Challenges!

USA / Faith In Humanity:
Trump. I have found it is key to remember he did not win a majority of the vote, and that the people who did vote for him did not really vote for him, rather they voted against politicians and a system that they feel has failed them (especially economically). I also remind myself how blessed I am to be living in interesting times, I just hope the country survives it.

Health:
My health has been good. I’ve been doing a pretty strict diet, with some treats while on vacation. I just got a pill cam and the results were ok, the doctors think they further confirmed I have Crohn’s disease. The hardest part is the anxiety and I worked a lot this year to ease those worries. I plan to get back on my strict diet next week after Christmas (enjoying a little dairy, gf bread, and sugar right now).

Mojo:
After the sale of Pressed, I took the rest of the year off to be with my family and rest. That has been really good and I am looking forward to some more rest through mid-2018. I need some wide open space as I figure out what is next for me.

2018…
I am looking forward to 2018 :)! I am playing with some ideas on a new business that I have been kicking around for a few years.

The sky is the limit…

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Morning Rehab = 600 Days

August17

I’ve made it 600 days straight with morning rehab, and it is time to say goodbye :). My back is feeling a lot better, and instead of doing lite rehab every morning I am switching to doing three 45 minute strength building session weekly. I am really proud that I made it 600 days straight. That kinda stuff is really challenging, and I struggled for a long time.

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Streaks Update + 30 Day Challenges

May23

How are my steaks doing? I am up to 445 days on meditation and doing sessions of 20 minutes. And, I am up to 515 days straight of my morning workout. That is pretty awesome and it has been a hard struggle that has gotten easier with time.

What challenges have I done lately?

1. 30 day challenge to not eat in front of the TV.
2. 30 day challenge to do a nightly mood log of nice things I did that day.

posted under Dangers To World, Fitness & Sports, Jar of Awesome, Life Planning & Execution | Comments Off on Streaks Update + 30 Day Challenges

2017 Plans…

January20

What am I hoping to do in 2017?

Theme Of The Year?
I want to get my mojo back! What does that mean? I want to refill my energy and passion. I’ve had a hard 3-year run and I want to get some of my energy/mojo back :).

Work Stuff…
1. Work to make Pressed a success.
2. Pursue some small fun projects around helping other entrepreneurs.
3. Keep focusing on how to execute to the best of your abilities.

My Stuff…
1. Find a new sport I am going to LOVE and will keep my back happy.
2. Plan out an adventure for late in the year.
3. Shed a lot of junk that is piling up in my closet.
4. Clear my desk and keep it clear.
5. Read at least 50 books.
6. Do more hikes with friends, and more lunches/coffee with people in my community.

Core…
1. Follow my current health and diet plan.
2. Keep my daily rehab and meditation habits.
3. Do my big workouts and FT 4x a week.

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2016 In Review.

January8

2014 was the toughest year of my life, and while 2015 was MUCH better and WAY more fun… so many of the things that caused stress in 2014 were still there and still had to be dealt with. I had high hopes for 2016 finally giving me a bit more space to find my mojo but that didn’t happen quite the way I wanted.

All in all, 2016 was a bit exhausting. I was working 2 CEO gigs for 85% of the year, one of those gigs was booting up a brand new tech startup which is a challenge, our family bought a house and moved 9+ times while getting it ready to be lived in, Lindsey got pregnant and we had a baby in December :), and I had to deal with a few health scares. There is a lot of good in there, but it was a pretty intense year.

2016 felt a bit like this…
giphy-2

I sat down a month ago and made a big timeline of everything going on in my life from 2014 to 2016 by month. It is pretty crazy how much shit went down over that 3 year period. Even after reading it I feel pretty amazed I am still standing. I am very confident that 2017 will be a bit more relaxed :).

The Amazing
Lindsey and I have been married for two years and it just keeps getting better and better :). I made a great choice and I hope she feels similar. We found out Lindsey was pregnant on April 20th and little Calico was born on December 30th 2016. This is a pretty momentous change to our lives, and we are pretty excited :). I am incredibly excited to be a dad!

In February we moved to Colorado and by March had bought a house in Boulder. Lindsey worked like crazy to get the house ready and by July we were moved in. We are loving our house and it is so nice to have a home/office and be less nomadic for a while. Between February to July we moved 9+ times as we scrambled to find new places whent he house work was delayed.

What other fun stuff did I do this year?
– Lindsey and I went on a 2 week baby moon to Maui Hawaii which was needed. We also spent a few weeks in Key West and Florida visiting friends & family. It was great to finally introduce Lindsey to my grandma, even if we have to do it everytime she wonders who is in the car with her :).
– Lots of amazing hikes in Colorado with Daniel and solo.
– I joined Vistage early in the year, and EO toward the end. Both those communities have been great, and I trying to learn how to better execute on ideas. This is a huge focus of mine for the rest of my life.
– I’ve managed to cement my morning ritual and I hit 380 consecutive days of morning rehab, and 310 days of meditation. I am pretty happy with keeping that up amidst a pretty choppy year.
– I am back to doing workouts 4x a week which feels great! They are light workouts but it feels great to sweat. I am slowly accepting that medical peoples have no clue about my back, and it is up to me to figure out what I can and can’t do.

The Challenges!

Health:
2016 was not a great year in the health department, but it did end on a positive note :). In January I got hit with some liver problems due to some preventative meds they had me taking. I stopped taking them and was back to normal by late March. Then in May they saw some signs inflammation might be back so I switched back to a super strict Paleo AIP diet and I’ve been on that ever since (7+ months). In August I got a colonoscopy and they didn’t see any sign of the disease now or historically so that was great to hear! Halfway through the year I also got some tests on my adrenal glands and the doctor discovered I am pretty zapped and at the end of a long stress cycle (duh!). So they gave me a mountain of hippie pills to help put humpty dumpty back together again :). I am feeling better now from an energy perspective and I am looking forward to getting my mojo back.

Komorebi:
Site5/WWWH was sold in June 2015 and for the 17 months following that I have been working two CEO gigs, one booting up my new startup Pressed, and one at WWWH to oversee the transition to the new owners. That was very stressful/tiring and I do not recommend doing it. Saying goodbye to Site5/WWWH after spending 7+ years building and running it was tough. I hope it finds a good home, as I haven’t been too impressed with what has happened under the new ownership. I was able to line up new homes for 75%+ of the team too which I feel good about. And, I think another 10% to 15% found positions through referrals a few weeks later.

Trump:
Somehow the country elected Trump to be the president of the USA. Trump is someone I wouldn’t hire to manage a McDonalds bathroom, let alone hand a pair of childproof scissors too. God help us all :). I am still working through what this means… it has caused a lot of reflection on what the American dream is for me, and what it is for other people. I am a globalist, I have friends all over the world, I am someone who thinks this country needs a strong social safety net in FDR style, and I am dumbfounded to see the very people who need help in the modern economy vote for someone who is going to screw them over. Hopefully, from the ashes the country emerges stronger (at least we might get a territorial tax system for people/companies finally).

2017
I am really excited about 2017! It is going to be a great year :). You can read my plans/goals here (COMING SOON).

Onward to 2017, ARRRRRGGGGGGG!!!!!!
giphy-3

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JOA – 365 Days Of Morning Rehab!

December24

screen-shot-2016-12-24-at-19-42-03

I hit 365 consecutive days of morning rehab workout :)!!!!

And 295 days of consecutive meditation. It would be 365 for both but during a work conference where I went to sleep late and had to wake up at 5am I forgot to meditate. My morning rehab is 7 minutes of planks to help strengthen my back (annular disc tear). I very slowly built up to a daily meditation practice of 20 minutes.

Any tips?

I am not sure they will help, but here is what I wish I could have told myself.

Be patient with yourself :). For the first part of the year I was struggling to do my rehab and meditation as the first thing of my day. That took a good 6 months to get going. But, for the last ~5 months as soon as I am out of bed I do rehab and meditation. Now I am trying to add my big morning workouts and foundation training to the start of my day before work.

For meditation, the sooner you jump to 20 minutes the better IMO. After ~15 days of 20 minutes it feels normal and I feel a lot more comfortable doing it. Sometimes I have meditations that are easy and in the zone, and other times my mind is like an energetic wet puppy. Regardless I think it does some good.

PS, I heard about jar of awesome concept on a Tim Ferris podcast and loved the idea. So I am going to see how well it works out for me. .

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JOA – 100 Days Of Meditation

June12

I just hit 100 consecutive days of morning meditation! Yay! If I hadn’t missed 1 day in March when I was up at 5am for a conference I would be hitting 163 :). My next goal is 180 days…

Screen Shot 2016-06-12 at 15.01.50

I’ve been trying to build a daily morning meditation practice since 2014 and it has been a real challenge. 2015 was a mess, with some months hitting it almost every day, and others only 1 or 2 times for the entire month. 2016 has been awesome though, I’ve been able to hit it almost every morning (big props to the Streaks App for helping in that regard.

PS, I heard about jar of awesome concept on a Tim Ferris podcast and loved the idea. So I am going to see how well it works out on a blog.

This is bwb’s personal blog, so he can share his thoughts with the world, however scary or silly they might be. Plus family and friends can track what I am up to, and where I am in the world.

I am pretty simple. I love Mangos. I love the ocean (although mostly at sunset, as I’m a ginger). I love to travel, eat exotic food, do long bike rides, read, and use my imagination. At some point, I decided it was better to be a pirate captain than an admiral. I am a globalist and see the entire world as my responsibility and playground. And I am married to an amazing woman who makes life even more fun :)! And we are now the proud parents of Calico Jack :).


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